Hating the Lakers is understandable
The world’s most recognizable franchise WAS too sexy for its own good.
Hating the lakers is understandable. It’s the same kind of envy we have for the children of celebrities. Kids who never have to work hard for what they get who get everything handed to them on silver platter because of their last names. Want to work for an NBA team? Sure no problem Ms. Buss. We know your father.
So, I get it. The Lakers are the annoying child that does drugs and doesn’t have to work as hard as every single other “kid” in the NBA does. Who, even if they don’t have their shit together, gets opportunities that other teams can only dream about. Really good players looking to rebuild their brands and score that next big contract? You don’t have to look hard to find them on the Lakers. Dwight Howard, Dennis Schroder, even Carmelo Anthony was able to revise his brand in Los Angeles before retiring for good, and you know what — it worked. If the Lakers were a fashion designer they would be Kanye West. If they were a rapper, they would be Kanye too, impervious from their mistakes, forgiven until the end of time for “their genius.”
The Lakers get everyone’s attention, so I get it.
This is partly because of our legacy as a championship NBA franchise, but there’s other championship franchises with Capital P pedigrees, like the Celtics for example who don’t have anywhere close to the same sparkle or cache as the Lakers. Boston fans hate that, but unfortunately it’s true. B. practically stop talking to me on multiple occasions just because I rooted for my hometown team. During the playoffs, I enjoyed watching him squirm, especially when he was gloating about the Pelicans owning the Lakers pick at the beginning of last season when we were in our 2-10 funk.
It’s partly because of where we are, right? There’s no city like Los Angeles. It’s the media hub of the world and players can build empires here outside of basketball: Lebrons movie studio. Westbrooks clothing label. Magic Johnson’s theaters. Shaquille o Neal’s acting career.
But even that doesn’t tell the story, because there’s other teams here in LA — looking at you, Clippers, who also have their own celebrity fans. Looking at you Billy Crystal and Floyd Mayweather Jr.
But something happens when you take all of these signature attributes: The city, the glam, the championship pastiche, shake them all up, and put them all together on one team. A magic sauce if you will, like an In N’ Out Burger or something. Same ingredients as every other burger but just tastes better for some reason.
So, I get it. It’s easy to hate us. We’re fucking nepotism come to life as a basketball team. Lilly Rose Depp meets Emma Roberts, i don’t know.
But here’s what I do know. I can confidently say this. For the first time in a long time The Lakers are doing something right. And that’s really dangerous. Because, all of a sudden; we have a front office that is rational; an owner who has can wear her Laboutin’s downtown without someone hawking a spit ball on her, the greatest fan base in the world, and most importantly of all — a top NBA Player Development Department. Aka scouting.
His name is Jesse Buss. He is the Assistant General Manager and Director of Scouting. He is also a co-owner of the team. Is he on Raya? And yeah, true to the Los Angeles Lakers brand, he is a Buss, related to Dr. Jerry Buss, the original owner, RIP, and cousin or some shit of current Team Prez Jeanie Buss. I don’t care what his last name is. What I care is that we no longer scout players like screenwriters flush ideas down the toilet. We use thought and creative thinking to find players that fit the team on the court, and the future of the game in the future. Austin Reaves, Alex Caruso, Malik Monk, Rui Hachimura, Max Christie. None of these players is a super star, and what I’m telling you is — that’s good! Finally. What I hated about the post-Kobe Lakers was the way they always tried to hit home-runs. Maybe you hit one every once in a while, but every time you miss it’s painful. That’s no longer happening, much to the chagrin of Lakers haters all across Denver, New Orleans, and Boston.
All of a sudden we have a system. After a bunch of years where all we had was the bits leftover after Kobe retired, we have a fucking professionally managed team, with a structure that works.
That’s real scary. That’s like… Laura Dern right there.
Sure, famous dad Bruce Dern is the man, we all know that; but Laura Dern is legit. She may be even better. Even more precise in her motivations as a performer. Even more versatile and talented with her range. What I’m a saying is that we’re not just resting on our famous last name anymore, now, there’s real reason to fear us.
We have 16 banners in our arena, hanging over our competitor’s heads like a horizon line, but we’re not letting that get in the way of hard work. We have high school players on every court from New Orleans to the United Arab Emirates dreaming to lace it up for us — of making it to our numbers, but we’re not using that as an excuse to kick back and drink schnapps when we should be in the gym. We’re putting in the work as an organization to earn our stripes, and not just waiting for Luca Doncic. Finally, we’re building from the inside, developing players, and not just trying to skip to the front of the line because we’re special.
Thank you, Jesse Buss!
After years of WTF-are-the-Lakers doing-throw-your-hands-up-in-the-air-fighting-for-daddy’s “legacy,” like a bunch of cracked out wild hyenas bullshit, I’m so proud of what we have in Los Angeles. Because what we have right now is special, haters be envious. Fuck the haters! We made it to the Western Conference Finals last year and it was fun. But that’s not good enough. We have a hungry team that wants to get back there next season and isn’t trying to make splashy moves anymore just for the brand. We have the league and media’s respect because we’ve earned it. And we have all of the eyeballs, like always. All of the nationally televised games, like we always do, even when we’re horrible.
So I get you. It’s easy to hate the Los Angeles Lakers. But sometimes cracked out famous people’s kids are cool too.